Cinta Sang Artis

Cinta sang artis,

Bermula manis,

Berakhir tragis.

Hidup seorang artis,

Bermula praktis,

Berakhir sadis.

Tutur seorang artis,

Bermula optimis,

Berakhir pesimis.

Harapan seorang artis,

Bagaikan air minitis,

Di dalam tapis tiris,

Lalu jatuh ke lapis,

Gambut yang menghiris........

p/s : dinukilkan masa saya di tingkatan empat, lantaran lambakan kes penceraian yang meningkat ketika itu khususnya lebih melibatkan pasangan daripada kelompok artis...

<> Inspired by my dad, who is an expert of Malay Literature Studies.

A cup of fun & a plate of jokes..

Sketsa 1 :

Cikgu : Ayah awak dah dapat kerja ke?

Aman : Dah cikgu, baru je...

Cikgu : Owh, baguslah kalau macam tu..keje apa, Man?

Aman : Penjual perabot, cikgu...

Cikgu : bagus tu. Camne perniagaannya setakat ni?

Aman : Maju, cikgu. Sangat laris jualannya, cuma tinggal katil je kat rumah kami..

Sketsa 2 :

Amin mengalami masalah terlebih berat badan. Dia berjumpa dengan doktor untuk mendapatkan nasihat..

Doktor : Owh cmtu ke..hmm, saya syorkan supaya awak berlari sejauh 6 kilometer sehari...

Amin : Kalau macam tu, berapa lama berat badan saya akan berkurangan?

Doktor : Tak lama, cuma 3 minggu je, mesti dapat kurangkan 10 kilogram...lebih baik dan berkesan

              daripada awak makan pil, tidur and belum pasti kurus!

Tiga minggu kemudian.....................

Kringggg!!! Kring!!!!!!

Doktor : Hello??

Amin : Dr, ni saya, Amin. Pesakit yang doktor suruh lari 6 km sehari tu...

Doktor : Owh, hah, kenapa?

Amin : Saya ada msalah besar ni..

Doktor : Apa bendanya?

Amin : Kini saya berada 126 km dari rumah...

Sketsa 3 :

In a restaurant..........

Customer : waiter! waiter! come here!

Waiter : Yes, sir! what's up?

Customer : There is a fly in my soup!

Waiter : Don't worry, sir. The spider on your table will eat it up..

Customer : wait! I said, there's a fly in my soup!

Waiter : What do you expect for RM 1.00, sir? A duck?

Customer : What is that fly doing in my soup?

Waiter : It is swimming, sir!

Sketsa 4 :

Patient : Doctor, my head gonna spinning.

Dentist : Stay quite and don't stir yourself. I'm checking your mouth.

Patient : Doctor, what's the best way to quit from smoking?

Dentist : Try to avoid setting fire to yourself.

Patient : Do you have a good news or bad news?

Dentist : Both.

Patient : Let me know the good news first.

Dentist : Your tooth are quite perfect..

Patient : Then, what is the bad?

Dentist : Your gums are so bad. I have to take out all your tooth

Sketsa 5 :

Amani : What do you get when a cow get stuck in an earthquake?

Amina : I think it should a cup of milkshake.

Amani : What do you think the longest word you ever mention?

Amina : Smile...

Amani : Why with that word?

Amina : because it has 'mile' in it.

Amani : What do you think the day do the chicken hate most?

Amina : Fry day

Amani : When you see a ghost, what do you think to serve for its dessert?

Amina : I scream

Sketsa 6 :

Atiq : Sape beruk?

Amin : Kaulah beruk.

Afiq : Tak. Kaulah..

Cikgu : Ni ape beruk-beruk ni?

Afiq : Ni cikgu, Amin kata saya beruk.

Cikgu : Sini kamu berdua. Cuba tengok tangan kamu berdua, ade beza?

Amin : Tak cikgu!

Cikgu : Cuba tengok mata, hidung dan telinga kamu berdua? ade lain ke?

Afiq : Tak cikgu. Sama sje.

Cikgu : Hah, kalau Amin kata Afiq beruk, Amin pun sama lah. Faham ?

Afiq dan Amin : Faham cikgu!

Sketsa 7 :

Cikgu : Aman, kenapa hantar kertas lukisan kosong? Ape yang kamu nak lukis?

Aman : Lembu memakan rumput.

Cikgu : Mana lembu dan rumputnya ?

Aman : Rumput dah abis kene makan, lepas makan lembu pun pergi. Jadi takde apa yang saya nak lukis, cikgu.

Sketsa 8 :

Ali : Ayah, Ali tak gila. Ali tak gila..

Ayah : kejap sjelah. Doktor cuma nak periksa. Ayah nak kan kepastian sje.

Doktor mental : Adik, 1 + 1 sama dengan berapa ?

Ali : 3!

Doktor mental : Adik ni lelaki ke perempuan?

Ali : Perempuan!

Ayah : Ali, jawablah betul-betul. Kau jangan buat ayah macam ni, jangan bagi jawapan bodoh.

Ali : Ali memang betul. Ali tak gila. Sapa suruh doktor bagi Ali soalan bodoh.

Sketsa 9 :

Chemistry teacher : What is the chemical symbol for barium, Afiqa?

Afiqa : Ba, madam.

Chemistry teacher : Sodium ?

Afiqa : Na, madam.

Chemistry teacher : So, what would we get after we add one molecule of barium into two molecules of sodium?

Afiqa : BaNaNa, madam.

Chemistry teacher : ?????????????

My dream car.

Volkswagen Beetle's Story, instead of Raya Event...he2

A Volkswagen Beetle, year 1972. Hah, just reminded me to my friend's dad. Her father ever had this one. The sound was " dudududududdudduud". What a funny tune. Guessed looked like a tortoise, ayte? So, cute and unique. Besides, this kind of car has possessed a waterproof property, that meant it can be floated when the flood come or slipped into the river or lake or any watery area. A touch of amazed technology by Germany Company.

This is the latest one model of Volkswagen Beetle. I do love it. Love its pattern and colour. Pink is my choice. The price is so expensive oooo..for the new edition is about RM139 888.00. Where can I get the money, since I am a university student yet =(. So, I can just keep it up till I have finished up my study first, got the job and save the money..hehehe. My mom ever asked me, " Why do you like this kind of car?" "Look, the pattern is so strange, like a childish mini car, small space, plus the colour is pink, ohh my dear." Then I just answered her. " Ummi, I do like the thing that looks like strange and funny. Ermm, no, actually it is unique. Cheerful, ayte? Hehehe"

This is light pink in colour. An open-close roof. All the model have the same properties.

I saw this one, yesterday, while I was in the journey to Perak. The plat is KB something. Wahh, that's my nickname! So jealousy!

I ever saw this colour of volkswagen beetle in my study place. Wahh, don't know who's its owner. Just now, I see in the internet, the price for the year 2000 model is around RM67 800. Unfortunately, it is still under my capability. So, do collect the money, first ya!